A LOT of people really don’t understand my infatuation with hardcore gyms. When I pitch them the idea of a small, hot, sweaty, loud music, ammonia smelling gym, they krinkle up their noses and turn their head sideways like a confused dog. “Bu..but…why,” they ask. “My locker room has a flat screen, I never have to wait for a machine, and there’s more tail running around than I can shake my weiner at.” Well, those are 3 very good reasons why I HATE commercial gyms. Not that I don’t like looking at attractive women sweating and working their ass off (or trying to grow one), but as we all know, I go to the gym for results, not to find a date.

On an aside: I just cracked my first goldeny delicious, seasonaly brewed only Leinenkugel’s Oktoberfest. Dear, Lord, thank you for creating Jacob (I think the “J” is pronounced as a “Y”) Leinenkugel, who in turn, created this masterful beer….or at least someone down his lineage did.

Right. Anyways, when I began my “real” lifting career, I was lifting in a hardcore gym and didn’t know it at the time. It is hardcore in every sense of the word. The only thing it was missing was a tire and a sled. My lifting partner, Jeremy Witt, and I managed to make it up to the school afterwards for some plyo’s and sprints though, so we made up for it.

A little about Brian…
I’m not real sure how old Brian is. Without hurting his feelings (and getting my ass kicked by him), I’m comfortable in saying that he’s at least 62 years old. At the young age of “62”, Brian still makes me look like a child in the weight room. He began his powerlifting career at the age of 38. Prior to that, he was a weight lifter, engineer, gym owner, and veteran of this U.S. of A. Now days, Brian enjoys his retirement by continuing his powerlifting career and training a few local athletes here and there. He holds numerous state records and quite possibly may even be setting new ones. Of course, that reason may be that there’s never been a powerlifter that sticks with it as long as he has, but hey, if you can dedicate your life to a single sport (lifestyle) as long as he has, you deserve a few “cake” records.

Ooo, also, I’m watching King Arthur. The one with a ton of badassery and a half-naked, body painted Keira Knightley. Iss nice. Vry niiice.

So then, back to this…I can honestly say, other than my undying love for football that began at the age of 8 or 9, Brian is the reason I was/am the athlete I am today. Under his training and nutritional advice (which consisted of, “eat big”….and that’s about it) I was able to get up to my heaviest ever until earlier this year at 195. Under him, I also recorded my best 40 time at 4.5 sec, best recorded vertical leap at 36” (though I think it’s higher now but unrecorded), and ran the pro-agility (20-yd shuttle) in 4.12 sec. It is also when I’ve set most of my PR’s (until recently): benched 285, Squat 315×3, deadlift 385, snatch 135, and powercleaned 235. Brian knows his shit and I am lucky to have met him.

With that, I give you the Northwoods Gym: